Okay, I need to clear things up.
Logo knows that I've been seriously dosing on the trucker pop--caffeine! It seems to be one problem--a big addiction. At least it isn't speed or meth.
I have also had some anxiety that I'll hear my dad's cries for help again--I'll find him passed out and naked again, or worse. You know it's bad when 911 is on speed dial. This has kept me up and worried to no end. Oh, BTW, I do live with my parents: I have been taking care of my ill father while my mom works off her last until she retires. This has stressed me to my limits and am looking forward to having my freedom again.
I had a major fight with someone close to me (3D).
I had a misunderstanding with Crystal. This post and the previous one, that she unfortunately saw, was not about her. Crystal is one of my best online friends I've made ever, and I was horrified when I saw that she felt the way she did. Can you just see my face when I saw that comment? My heart plummeted. I'm so sorry, Crystal. God, how could I ever write something so nasty about a great friend like you? If I did write anything bad like that about you, God would spank me hard--I'm talking about the real one here. If anyone here even for a moment thought anything bad about Crystal, get down on your knees right now and pray to God for forgiveness. If you don't do that, then God will have me do something biblical to you. Ok?
My insomnia has to end. Sleep apnea is also a problem in my family. I sure as hell hope I don't have that. Insomnia really messes with you. It has made me worry more than usual, so I've seemed obsessive. It has also made thoughts pop up that are not welcome. I know what to do with these thoughts--just kick them out as soon as they enter, then talk to somebody right away. If I was hounding you, whoever, just know that I eventually find someone who can talk to me and I'm good. I can't help it if I have preferences=) You should feel good that I try so many times to get your attentions. It means I think highly of you and value your words. You know who you all are.
Thanks everyone. You have all helped a great deal, and I will reward you all for sticking with me. There's going to be some rip-roaringly funny shit coming up. I just needed to vomit out the darkness first. I don't want to taint the pure gold coming up.
The dove in below's post is for peace. I hope that settles it.
3 years ago