Brought to you by the effects of Stockholm Syndrome from holding myself hostage for so many years.
Saturday, June 17, 2006
Oh, the agony!
Is it too much to ask, God, to not strike me down with an intense, and acute, bowel affliction when I meet a cute girl who stops to talk to me on the street? Is it? You know I'm in need, so why Jesus, why? Stop laughing at me! Do you think that this makes me want to go to heaven now, do you? I can't fly like Superman to visit cool girls in far off lands, and now I am being cursed in my own providence, my supposed Zion? What is that saying: "A prophet is never appreciated in his own land"? Eff dis sheeit! I need to do a world tour and get Immonium AD to sponser me. Seriously!