Thursday, October 04, 2007

TIGF!!! (That's Incredibly Gay Friday): Rocky III+, featuring the beach

There is no doubt that Rocky kicks ass, as evident in the first two movies. However, we were subjected to more and more of this Italian Stallion's extra 21st chromosome of a life story: Going from training in a gaudy, palatial, media drome facility to either some hood pit and/or Siberian Summer home; raising annoying offspring with bad taste in rebellious ear rings; rags to riches, to rags again, melodrama; Bridget Nielsen; and Uncle Paulie's robot girlfriend. Oh, and not to mention that the U.S.S.R. had nuclear powered gyms with loads of blinking lights and laser graphics--while we all know their shit is still getting converted from vacuum tubes to transistors.

Also, there is the little matter of Rocky going from "Sloth" (Goonies) to articulate millionaire, and then back to New Jersey wharf rat retard/Sloth again--except he's from Philly. What in the hell was Adrian doing to this poor man? I think at some point she gave up listening him try to read his stocks out loud in order to speed up the morning breakfast and started putting salt peter and lead chips in his oatmeal. She liked him better dumb anyway, just with less humping now that her bones were brittle. I really don't know where I was going with that one.

The most TIGF!!!, but in a good way, was the music of Survivor. If it were not for "The Eye of the Tiger", who knows how bad that fool would have been pitied. In fact, "Rocky III" features the gayest scene ever: Rocky and Apollo running together on a beach, followed by a wet, encircling embrace. I think the only thing that kept them from doing each other right then and there was Rocky's strict "no butt sex for six weeks" rule before each fight.

Here is the full training sequence from Rocky III, complete with "happy ending". Enjoy!

10 comments:

Photogirl said...

that is the most TIGF video I've seen in a long time. that hug at the end is priceless!

Chandra said...

The only thing I got from all of this is Rocky and Eye of the Tiger. Still never seen a Rocky except for the run up the stairs dealy....Actually Mr. Stallone is really really short like 5'5 or 5'6. I could take him!!!! LOL

Eye of the Tiger is not a romance song, and does not promote "action."

These are my thoughts.

egan said...

That's such a grayt scene.

Did you like the most recent Rocky flick? I was pleasantly surprised by it.

Jules said...

I think the best scene in there was when the camera zoooooomed in on each of their crotches for a good close-up running, package bouncing around all over the place... left to right, right ot left, left to...

ummm... what was I talking about? Just call me distracted. Ehem... where's the rewind button?

The Grunt said...

Celeste~ The twirling is the best part.

Chandra~ Maybe "Eye of the Tiger" doesn't do it for you, but for some of us...

Egan~ I did and I was pleasantly suprised as well. I still dig the TIGF ones too.

Jules~ Um, have you had your breakfast yet? Seems like someone needs a sausagefest.

Chandra said...

Hmm interesting... and good to know lol. That says a lot about you.

You aren't a "barry manilow, barry white" get it on marvin gaye kind of guy!

EBEZP said...

I love the rocky films all of them but the last one was not as good but that says more about me than you grunt!!
Eye of the Tiger does it for me!!

Logophile said...

wow
I had no idea Rocky was actually gay porn.

Karyn said...

Okay, I don't know a lot about Rocky or Stallionness or chromosomes but I do know this:

The Goonies. ROCK.

I love that movie. I don't care how old I am, that movie kicks ASS.

Tys on Ice said...

Hey...i liked rocky...ok, cudnt understand a word of wht he said...i tought tht was becoz they forgot to take his mouthpiece out between shots..i saw the last one , the bloddy guys is still in great shape....not friging fair!!!!