Tuesday, July 17, 2007

Randomorama

Why is it that you can feel some people more when they are gone than when they are around you?

Which level of Dante's hell do they shove Brillo pads up into your asshole and light them on fire?

If you say "new direction" long and hard enough, something funny starts to happen.

Which level of Dante's hell does Mark Twain have to start writing children's books? Cook books by Milton, anyone?

I will not stand for such suffering. Here, let me bend over.

The farmer said to the milk maid, "Nice tits!"

So, did they ever find out if Elliott Smith was stabbed by his girlfriend? That would be a hell of a way to kill yourself. By the way, "Between the Bars" is now playing on my I-Tunes.

Pablo Picasso should've done one more painting.

Antarctica is the white supremest of all the continents of the world. Don't let the cute penguins fool you.

Llamas bring joy to a little boy named Billy; which, unfortunately, will result in him developing a rather disturbing sexual phillia. These are the unseen and adverse effects of animal therapy.

Overheard in a rest home: "But, their fur is so silky soft!"

Where you go with that one might take you into a bad place.

I am finished for the night.

Good Eberling!

12 comments:

goldennib said...

These random thoughts are like my dreams.

Scary Monster said...

There be no levels to hell but fer the ones we create ourselves.
Yet, me would like to see what a cookbook by Mr.Clemens would be like.

Good to see you lettin it hang out, Cap'n

STOMPIN.

Outdoorsy Girl said...

The first time I read your randomorama I was too sleepy to absorb it all. I can't remember what I was doing up so late when I read this...hmmm... Anyway, I came back to give it another read. Your thoughts of randomness still impress and baffle me, but I am having a hell of a fun time saying "New Direction" over and over.

Logophile said...

You know, as someone who actually did read Inferno I am saddened to inform you Twain, Brillo pads and even Milton were not mentioned.
Alighieri was terribly old fashioned you know, probably disappoved of anachronisms.
As for Picasso, he was a well-known slacker, he should have done at least two more.
Antarctica has always seemed a bit shady to me, now I know why.
Love me some Grunty!

Jules said...

I did the New Direction thing for the last 10 minutes and all I've gotten was dizzy...

Chandra said...

I feel so out of the loop since I haven't seen march of the penguins. I remember sea world because of the penguins and because that's where my parents dumped me while they went to the busch gardens!

Also what's with all the bum references? Intruiging yet alarming.

P.S I LOVE RANDOMNESS!

Sun Follower said...

I miss Elliot Smith (he actually lived in my greater neigborhood)... and they never did find out HOW he died, but they never ruled out foul play. *sigh*

"Say Yes" is on my iPod :)

Keshi said...

hehe Grunty some pretty good thoughts there.

**Why is it that you can feel some people more when they are gone than when they are around you?

its always the case isnt it. O well I guess thats cos we r human and all humans tend to take others for granted until they r gone.

HUGS
Keshi.

Melliferous Pants said...

All levels of hell lead to working in a cubicle.

You're welcome.

The Grunt said...

Nessa~ My randomness is here to serve you.

Scary~ Letting it all hang out is fun until someone with zeal for decency and a fly swatter shows up.

O-Girl~ Remember, long and hard. Tee-hee!

Logo~ It seems that Dante left a few details out. You are always welcome to a Grunty fix.

Jules~ Well, you weren't doing it right, or maybe you were doing it too well. It was one of the two.

Chandra~ The bum is an old comedy standard.

Sun~ I can always count on you sharing the same great taste in music as I do. That is really intriguing about Elliot Smith's death, also about him having lived in your neighborhood.

Keshi~ I can feel your hugs halfway around the world.

Pants~ Don't forget the menses!

Photogirl said...

the best directions ARE new!

;)

Jules said...

P.S. The answer to #1 is because you hold them close to your heart... and when you do that, they are with you everywhere.