Wednesday, November 15, 2006

A two-part post: Dream, Dream, Dreeeeeam & Mexican Boy Mall Adoptions

Hi, Grunt here, I just wanted to say that "Tuesday's Tips for Teens" is off the air for awhile. I am getting ready to tackle the "Wooderson" saga. I will do a refresher course post on that guy soon, so you newbies can catch up.

I was inspired to share my dreams when I read Vera's fabulous dream post tonight. You can read it here.

I only wish I had hosted the Everly Brothers, sans all the violence, in my dreams last night. Good music would have been welcome. Instead, I had freaky-assed dreams, and not the freaky-assed that could be mistaken with sexy, mind you.

For starters, I was lost in that fabled town that is comprised of every little quaint village that I have frequented/lived in my lifetime, yet is supposed to be the town that I live in currently. Parts of my past in England and various orchard towns along my home state of Utah get incorporated into a collage of sorts where I tend to have repeated themes of looking for a certain bakery/restaurant, person's home, or some forbidden/enchanted place.

This night I found a large kitchen, at which I supposedly was a chef. It was some kind of converted funeral home turned into a restaurant and they didn't take the caskets out; rather, the corpses were still in the caskets, and the caskets were left around everywhere. The most unsettling part of this was that they were propped open in various forms of display, standing up, partially open, or hanging out. My trip back to this place was to resolve something; what exactly, I don't know. I just remember an older woman placing my hand on the cutting board and nicking my thumb. I then held my bleeding thumb over some flour and began to knead it into a dough.

I baked this dough, and when it was done I pulled the bread out: it was now in the shape of the Star of David. I looked around and noticed that I was now among many gentiles in the city. I was compelled to convert all I came in contact with to Judaism, of which I am not. I tried to get mothers to give their sons barmitzfas, circumcisions, convince them of the merits and blessings of observing passover and a kosher diet in the correct manner. The weirdest part of this dream was the fact that when I needed sustenance, I would open a pouch on the inside of my foot and grab a hunk of gorgonzola cheese.

Okay, let the psychoanalysis begin.

Now, onto less weird things. I was at the mall on Monday. I took that whole day off from work, so I could enjoy the day before The Who concert. I was there at the mall to catch a flick, the new one with Will Ferrell, "Stranger Than Fiction". This turned out to be a great movie. Well, here I am walking through the mall, my brother was at some other shop and I decided that I wanted to walk the entire mall and see what I have been missing. See, I have not actually been in a mall for quite some time, and I have determined that I have not been missing much.

I am walking? Yeah, that's right. So, I start to feel like I have company. I look around and don't see anyone. I keep walking and still feel like I have someone right next to me. This time I look down. Lo and behold, there's this little Mexican boy staring up at me with an ice cream cone stuck in his gob. The moment our eyes fixed on another, we froze. The kid stopped eating his ice cream cone and let some of it drip down his chin as his eyes just grew to saucer-like proportions, as if to say, "Who the eff are you?" I had the same open-mouthed look on my face as I said to myself, "Where in the hell did he come from and where are his parents and/or guardians?" (Yes, I actually said "and/or guardians" in my head).

Well, the kid just took off after about ten seconds of our strange, little, staring contest. I sure hope he found his parents and/or guardians. I just wonder how long we had accompanied each other on our stroll through the mall. Funny.

10 comments:

goldennib said...

I have checked with the little talking Freud doll I keep in my pocket and he said that was a good dream. It means you have been following the rules for a while now and it is time for that blood you've added to your efforts is about to produce a basic, filling and satisfying change in your life.

Thank goodness you aren't a kidnapper. Nothing like the kid making it easy for someone. My mom used to end up with strangers all the time. She was very into her shopping.

vera said...

Your dream kicks my dream's ethereal ass! Excellent. You're a smart man, I'm dead certain you see all the religious symbols in your dream... But I think we need to concentrate on the cheese. The cheese is the key... ;)

Saw "Stranger Than Fiction" last night... I LMFAO!! What a great film. "Who just said 'Harold counted brush strokes'????"

/Vera

Karyn said...

Honey, what the HELL did you eat before bed?

Now, analysis is something I actually know about. And to me? It sounds like you're processing a lot of stress about perception, about death and dying (not surprising) and the conflicts our mainstream media brings to our livingrooms on a daily basis.

And you're hungry.

Which is weird because I would SWEAR you ate something funky, and a lot of it, before bed...

Scott said...

K, that is a little odd dude... are you sure that the Mexican boy was not part of the dream? Very Twin Peaks.

Scott

"K" Fingerett said...

"...let the psychoanalysis begin." I'll leave that to the people who know what they are talking about...

*ahem*


Dear Mr. Grunt Man,

The bit about the little boy was pretty funny. Now when you looked around, did you REALLY look all the way around or did you just look over you shoulders? And are you super tall? or was he really that small? (or both) how'd you miss him?

I guess he thought you were his daddy...Maybe, at one point, you could have been-- MAYBE, the little boy and his family were walking next to you at one point, and the little boy was too into his ice cream to notice the sharp turn his parents made.

I'm sorry that you had that awkward moment.

Did you get anything at the mall? Or did you just go "Man shopping" (entering the mall for one thing and leaving once it is purchased) in addition to your little walk around the mall?

Just wondering...


~K

Outdoorsy Girl said...

Dang! You have crazy dreams! And I thought mine were weird...well, maybe they would be that weird if I slept long enough to have more dreams!

The mall experience was weird as well. The kid probably trailed off from his family and thought you were his dad until he looked up at you and realized Oh my god, you ain't my daddy!

Christielli said...

Your post just reminded me that I had a bizarre dream last night where my roommate got married at city hall which lead me needing to find a new place to live. It stressed me out.

Jules said...

Okay, for me, the key is the link in your subconscious about getting nicked with the knife and circumcisions. I think you are having flashbacks to infancy! Was cheese your favorite food as a child?

Poor little boy - wouldn't it have been GREAT to capture his expression in a phot though?! I gott astart carrying a camera around with me everywhere I go.

The Grunt said...

Nessa~ I like what you had to say. I really do hope my efforts pay off. Yeah, I am child safe, too. I am surprised how well you know what is going on with me. Have you sent one of your little nibs to spy on me? That's cool. I need looking after.

Vera~ I am smart! The cheese was the best, too.

Karyn, I had some kind of pina colada jello right before I went to bed. I have been thinking about death a lot, but more in a way of fascination and wonder. My own mortality and my nephew's might be something to consider.

Scott~ Yeah, I'm starting to question my whole reality here. LOL!

"K"~ Yeah, I think he was just lagging behind. The first time I looked, I did notice him but there were enough people around me at the time to just think that he belonged to them. It was that second time when we were kind of off from any other groups of people that I realized I had this four-year-old kid in tow. Well, that's how old he looked.

O-girl~ Yeah, I am the king of weird dreams. You just have to wake up during one of them in order to recollect them better.

Christielli~ I hate those type of "stress out" dreams that seem so real. I am glad that it didn't really happen.

Jules~ Get a camera phone. They're great. I wasn't about to take a photo of someone else's kid, though. That is creepy as hell. I would punch out anyone that did that to one of my own--if I had kids.

Cheese has to be one of the greatest foods ever invented. Seriously!

cindra said...

My kids have grabbed the leg of strangers before...then were mortified to see it was not attached to either Tom or myself...great lil' story. The dream is a total trip. I envy you remembering all that!

HOW WAS THE CONCERT???

Did Roger take his shirt off? Did Pete smash his guitar over your head?
Don't forget to go to my place with a cuppa coffe and vote.