I'm not ready to do any memes yet...

I need another day, Maiden, Scary Monster.

The only kind of blogging that I have been in the frame of mind to do lately is totally unstructured and random. I've got emails to write but I get down here and just blank out. I'm feeling happy, but kind of in a spaced out way. I'm lost just a tiny bit; out of control, perhaps. There are some new elements in my life that I'm sort of floating in, forgetting to take care of business due to the novel qualities of it all. I never see things coming...things like this. What things? Hell, I don't know, but they are things. I write songs about things that I have no understanding of. It kind of makes me seem like I might know something about it all, but I don't.

I need a Slim Jim and a Dew right now, but it is way too late for that kind of luscious poison.

I've turned my cell phone back on today. I go through those phases where I either don't want to have the anxiety associated with phone calls, or I rack up the bills by surfing the web with it while at work.

I used about five minutes of my day looking at the mountainside in my hometown. I marveled at how much of the terrain I had explored when I was younger. A 19-year-old kid was shooting the shit with me while I was doing this. He was telling me about a rock that he was doing some climbing on last Saturday. When I asked him to describe the rock I pointed out to him, "There, you were right there, weren't you?" I was right. I had climbed that 30 foot rock with my friends in my sophomore year while skipping school. After telling him about that wild day (I about fell to my death while climbing on top of an irrigation line to cross a ravine--50 foot drop) I went on to show him where all the little mine shafts were hidden on the mountainside. I told him about a blind chute that cut into a cliff way up on the mountain--a secret way to the top. He just sat there and was in amazement at how much I knew about this little area. I don't think there will be many kids anymore who will venture out like my friends and I did. Technology is such a great drug.

Another person at work had their spouse die. It has been the third one in two weeks. I hate signing those cards. It is so sad. What do you say, really?

I've got to spend a load of money getting new shoes for my baby. My baby sure is ugly, but damn if Clyde don't take me to cool places. After that I need to rebuild the steering box and weld up a new tail pipe. I sound like a hick, don't I? Take out your Swiss Army knife and pull out the least sharp protrusion. Shake it like you are shaking someone's hand. There, we've finally met in real life. I am not a rich man, but then again, who gives a shit.

Old growth wood vs. farm wood. Think of how long a tree in nature takes to get to where it does and then take a farm tree. The farm tree is fertilized and cultured to grow tall fast. Think about this: a 300 year old tree and a 70 year old tree are the same in stature. Which tree has the most tree rings (better wood)? The 300 year old one does, of course. What does this have to do with the price of condoms in a nightclub bathroom? Fine quality musical instruments, that's what. Essentially, you can kiss the glory days of all wooden musical instruments goodbye. What else does this mean? Wall Street bankers buying fifty year old guitars and seeing their investment go from $7,000 to $100,000+ in a matter of a decade. Last time I checked, these dudes weren't exactly musicians. The world can be so stupid. I've also wondered how much bloodshed my mahogany bodied beauties caused. Like I said, the world can be so stupid.

I'll visit all you guys soon. I wasn't that funny tonight, but I guess I didn't have to be.

Who used to take the au jus from school lunch French dip sandwiches and pretend that it was coffee?

Willy Wonka was a pedophile, straight up.

My theme song while cruising: "The Lonely Bull", Herb Alpert and the Tijuana Brass. Put that shit on and wear some killer shades while scoping out the action on the 'varde. You will not be disappointed.

Gum drops keep falling down my pants.

Wuh-wuh-wuh-wuh!

The end.