Brought to you by the effects of Stockholm Syndrome from holding myself hostage for so many years.
Thursday, December 21, 2006
Wonder Bread: It's not just food--it's a way of life!
Wonder Bread walks into a bar and notices a lonely girl sitting on a stool drinking her Red Stripe. Wonder Bread knows that this girl has got something serious going on in her head. All the other guys are just staring at her tits. Wonder Bread approaches this girl and strikes up some conversation.
Wonder Bread: "Hi, my name's Wonder, Wonder Bread. But, you can call me Butter Top. And you are?"
Girl: "Uh, you can call me Yogi."
Wonder Bread: "As in bear?"
Girl: "Ha-ha, yeah, as in bear--long story....Hey, I like your bag and twist lock, btw. Green is my favorite color."
Wonder Bread: "Ah, thanks. You know, hardly anyone comments on my green twist lock. I usually go for the white one for everyday and red, for when I'm going out on the town. Oh god, I'm such a dork."
Wonder Bread: "Well, here I am yammering on about my twist lock and I totally don't say anything about your eyes. You've got great eyes, bonita."
Girl: "Shut up."
Wonder Bread: "Mind if I sit with you?"
Girl: "I dunno. Are you man enough?"
Wonder Bread: "Another Red Stripe for the lady and a glass of buttermilk for me."