I've got this bird that sits on a branch near my bedroom window that bursts into full on, piercing, "TWEET, FUCKING TWEET" every morning around 5 o'clock. The bird's voice is actually very beautiful, but not at that time of the morning. I've got these crusty ear plugs sitting on my night stand as my only defense. They are too uncomfortable to wear all night long, so I do this mad grab for them in the dark of early morning every time this little shit starts up. Getting them into my ears quickly, before I'm fully awake, can be hard. Plus, I need to clear off this night stand because one time I shoved a cough drop into my ear by accident.
I have a different work schedule that puts my bedtime around 1:30 AM, so waking up at five in the morning is not fun. I am not able to pull the same shit I could back in college. I need my eight hours of sleep, when I can get them. Mr. Birdie McTweet-Tweet is starting to drive me batty-go-losehismind.
I've had all the thoughts of how to terminate this pest, but I just don't have the heart to actually do it. I am now choosing to look at the situation as that of a friend coming by to say hello--a retarded friend that doesn't know that 5 AM is to damned early to sing your effin' heart out.
Maybe I just need a good supply of "throwing" cats handy by my window. That is a breed of cat, right?
3 years ago