Friday, March 30, 2007

TIGF!!! (That's Incredibly Gay Friday): Stormtrooper's "Don't Ask. Don't Tell" policy

You know, it would be a strange sight to be facing an entire "pink" army.

Now, are we to assume that the clone offspring of Jango Fett would never deviate from clonosexual preferences? I'm sure that there would be some question to what clonosexual even is. What I am trying to figure out is this: Who do the Stormtroopers make it with? Ewoks? Wookies? C3PO?

What are they trying to hide from us? This tight lipped policy of "Don't Ask. Don't Tell." is really confusing. So, I'm here to propose something: Clonosexual equals Stormtrooper on Stormtrooper action.

Look, it is perfectly unnatural and that is alright. I mean, Stormtroopers are unnatural themselves, so it all works out.

What is truly sad though is that there were Stormtroopers who weren't so open with their love for each other, and look what happened to them. I mean, their outfits just screamed, "Oont, look at me funboy. I am sexy uniform wearing for you. Ya, oont strap me dawoon!" But, they just could not express this desire in a socially acceptable way: pity.


Claire said...

Bizarre, yet fabulous. Oh how I love TGIF!


Jules said...

HA!!!! That was hilarious!!!!! I wanna get me a pink storm trooper... no, make that two... and then pretand like I used to with my Barbies! LOL

Photogirl said...

Have you seen the Stormtrooper outfits? There's nothin under there that needs any sexual healing my friend. Those are A-sexual dudes.

Logophile said...

Is this post really about your recently discovered love for Trundling Grunt?
Its ok, honey.
Just be yourself.

The Grunt said...

Claire~ You know I have you in mind when I do TIGF!!!

Jules~ Pretending is fun.

Celeste~ It's Clonosexual: they emit spores and drink wouldn't understand.

Logo~ You wish! I know it has been your secret desire to harness the powers of two grunts.

Bace Man said...

Grunt, I used to subscribe to the 'spore emitting, gingerale drinking' theory...however, new thinking suggests that is a cover to throw the rest of us off. The latest replication theory being introduced, is these that these clone babies are manufactured at an underground facility and pipelined into a distribution center where they are then packaged up and shipped off to toy stores everywhere....cleverly disguised as lego figures.

Chandra said...

This post went right over my head... Star wars????It somehow went from pink army to brokeback mountain and stormtroopers? I guess it's the weekend so i should know better then not to drink before I read any of your posts haha. Write a post about sharks and I might have a chance.

ps. getting to hang out with us army and canadian army men and women... scary and powerful.,..
sorry for the tangents lol

Outdoorsy Girl said...

I'm totally loving the word "clonosexual". It's yet another Gruntabulous word I will have to add to my vocabulary.

The Grunt said...

Bace Man~ Good to see you back! I think you have something there. The whole Stormtrooper lifestyle is rather mysterious. I mean, we all know that they have a dark side...a-har-har!

Chandra~ I don't drink myself, but I have heard that other's seem to get a big kick out of reading my blog whilst drunk.

O-Girl~ Learn from the master you do, yes! Help you learn Gruntabulous words I will, Mmmm-eheheheheh!

It's a Star Wars thing.

Balou said...

LOL! Fun post. Logo sent me. And just for your entertainment, Stormtroopers dig pink too:

Photogirl said...

haha. You're right. I don't understand!