I took the above picture while hiking in a deep canyon in the Wasatch range. It's a bit out of focus. I was frightened. I could not hold my camera phone still. What are the chances that I would come across such a mythical creature in the real world? But there it was: a garden gnome roaming around in its natural habitat. I was just happy to get out of there without a shovel mark or a bearding.
Here is another rare creature: the "ghost-eyed" Yogi. This is rumored to be the ghost of a tortured circus bear, a brown bear from Russia. Apparently, the bear died from dysentery--he drank the water down in Tijuana. They say that if this bear appears before you while you are eating a taco, you will suffer from lethal diarrhea.
This is the place where bad animals and garden gnomes go when they die: to motor travel lodges along the old highway systems around the U.S., doomed to entertain and scare the shit out of lost souls who can't afford to stay in a real hotel.
Oh, and yes, that gnome is giving you the finger, the other gnomes belong to the Crips, and that baby bear is giving a hand job to the bear on the left.
3 years ago