Sunday, February 24, 2008

An assortment

First off, how were all of your weekends? Mine was way too short and my body decided that it was fed up with all the shit I've been through and shut down on me. The problem is that my mind wasn't tired and the little green gremlins started wrecking havoc with my psyche. I'm not ready to post about what I am feeling right now because I just want a break from it. Essentially, I need to gather my thoughts and then tell all of you how much I need you to stick around and help me out. I may have completed my treatments, but my recovery is just starting. Life is such a wonderful pain in the ass, sometimes.

I'll share a few jokes with you to lighten the mood. These are some that I have heard recently.

How many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

There's these two guys watching a dog lick his balls. One of the guys turns to the other and says, "Gosh, I wish I could do that." The other guy remarks, "Well, don't you think you should start out by petting him first?"

Finally, the requisite blond joke:
A blond walks up to a counter and says, "Yeah, I'd like to order a cheeseburger." The woman behind the counter answers tersely, "Young lady, this is a library." The blond then whispers back, "Oh, sorry. I'd like to order a cheeseburger."


How about those Oscars? I was so happy about "No Country for Old Men" doing so well. A lot of people didn't like that movie, especially the way it ended. I totally got the movie and the ending. I could watch that movie again and again. I will also constantly have nightmares of Siguor coming at me with a cattle gun.

Post break time: Watching "The Wire" on HBO. Will be back in an hour.

I'm back and now I'm really not sure where I take this post from here. I did a short post at 120 dB's, my almost defunct music blog. The post was just a short riff on the "sound" of radiation.

I need to thank the person that I talked to on the phone tonight while I was on a walk. Usually, I take off and my mind sorts things out, gets clear. Not tonight, however. Going past the cemetery where Drunk "D" was buried, and the wooded park where I was almost abducted as a child, were just going to dredge up more of the junk at the bottom of the pond. I needed some light-hearted chat tonight. Thanks a million for making it easier for me. I know I didn't let on that I was having problems, but now you have it--well, at least part of the story.

I've got a bad rash. I think my skin couldn't take the stress anymore, and Friday morning there it was. I've also been waiting and waiting to celebrate with some Mexican food, but since my esophagus is fried like a churro, I am not ready yet.

Another work week begins and I am curious as to what just working without doing cancer treatments will be like. I have been close to imploding for some time now. I need a break, but I've got mucho medical bills to pay. I also want to change jobs. But I fear that I am suddenly throwing too much on my plate too soon. I don't want to settle comfortably in a rut again, yet I also need to rest and get my bearings. I don't know how to shut my mind up and just chill the eff out. I wonder if that Calgon shit really works.

Which brings me to brooms. Brooms? Yes, those motherfuckers. Wait, weren't you the guy who just said "eff" instead of fuck? I am and I did. Don't waste your time pointing out my inconsistencies to me, because I am full of them and it...and I know it. If only you knew. Anyway, brooms, the ones that you sweep shit up with. What if you found that your household broom, sitting in your kitchen closet, could take you flying like a witch's broom? Where would you go first? Would you just say nuts to work and other responsibilities and just get the hell outta Dodge? I would, and so my imaginary pet goldfish Rodger would die. Sad that.

You guys would cover me, right? He doesn't eat much, Rodger. He loves the sushi, the sick bastard.

Try the coffee cake. I made it myself.


Diane Mandy said...

I can't imagine the stress you have been facing, physically and emotionally, the last several months. You are a strong person handling things as well as you have. Keep on hanging in there! Things will getter better.

Tys on Ice said...

hey , all the best on ur cancer free work days...enjoy it...u truly are a hero..

egan said...

I've heard The Wire is a great show, but like many shows I've got to start from season 1.

I liked The Oscars last night. I didn't see as many movies as I'd like due the new parent thing. The good thing is most are now becoming available on pay-per-view.

Good luck with your recovery and I enjoyed the jokes. Can you not lick your own balls?

NYD said...

It's good to see you back in form.
The broom is out of date. Get yerself a Hoover. Then you can listen to yor favorite tunes while cruising the friendly skies.

Sun Follower said...


Or as the Beatles say:

"Turn off your mind, relax
and float down stream"

Jules said...

I'd go to the UK. Wish me luck at home tonight... it's D-Talk Day.

Outdoorsy Girl said...

I saw your movie win and I thought of you! I knew that you would be happy about that. Now I am curious and think I need to see it myself.

Light hearted talks (especially while taking a walk on a nice night) can do wonders sometimes. Chances are, you probably did that person a world of good, also, and didn't even know it. :)

The Grunt said...

Diane~ It is just hard because you think that when the treatments stop that you will automatically feel better. I look forward to better days ahead.

Tys~ Yeah, at least the amount of problems I am having are less. It will take some time to adjust, but I will get there.

Egan~ Sadly, no, I cannot lick my own balls. This is a good thing because I need reasons to leave the house, not stay in.

NYD~ The Hoover really is the way to go.

Sun~ Meditation would definitely help. Listening to the Beatles would be even better.

Jules~ Good luck with the big talk. I hope that the things thrown across the room are kept to a minimum. The UK is where I'd go as well because I need to visit my friends there.

O-Girl~ Well, Prozac is the next step if things don't get better, but the walks and talks are good medicine.

Photogirl said...

I'd hold off on changing careers just yet. Give the old body and mind some time to rest up, relax, and get healthy. Too many things on your plate will just make it all that harder to recover.

Julie Schuler said...

I really want to see "No Country for Old Men"! You're so lucky. The last movie I saw in the theatre was one of the LOTR, which wasn't something I picked, I'll tell you that. And I was eight months pregnant. Leg cramps. Walking up and down the aisle until it was over. Then the film snapped in the last ten minutes and the fucker burned up! Didn't even see the end after all that. Sorry, I should rant on my own blog.

Anyway. "The Road" is going to film here in my neck of the woods. Around Pittsburgh, I think they'll be starting soon.

God, I miss going to movies!

Autumn Storm said...

Grunt, lack of connection has meant I have hardly been on the last weeks. Will catch up here asap, skimmed to make sure you were doing okay, and I will read deeply later today/tomorrow connection willing. Take care, xo