Thursday, December 18, 2008

My sugar momma

There's this older woman at work that gave me an expensive gift for Christmas. In the morning I'm getting my teeth laser whitened. It's friggin' sweet!

Oh yeah, wish me luck on my concert tomorrow. I've got my rig all figured out. I just hope there is enough real estate on the stage for my gear. I wish you all could be there. I need somebody to throw panties and bras at me.

I recently purchased an awesome book on cryptozoology. If there was a magazine called "Bigfoot Fancy", I'd be a life long subscriber. In fact, when I see those "Nobody's Born a Bigot" bumper stickers, I always misread them as "Nobody's Born a Bigfoot." You must become Bigfoot through trial and error, I think.

I often wonder if Bruce Lee were alive today would he be doing an infomercial with Elvis about awesomeness? If so, It would involve a 12-step program, kicking ass, and a styling gel.

Just think if real people talked like they did in movies such as Juno. I really liked that movie, but if people around me were talking all smart-ass loud and shit, with an almost too hip to be real preciousness, I'd take up a new hobby called homicide.

I'm done.

8 comments:

Julie Schuler said...

We used to get Fortean Times, back in our childless days. That's an awesome magazine. I don't know if it's still around. We quit getting it when it was around $10 an issue.

Chris said...

If Bruce Lee were alive today, I'm reasonably sure he'd be Governor of California

Outdoorsy Girl said...

Good luck with the concert!!! Kick some ass! Wish I could be there to cheer you on but I will still toss my panties in the air for you anyway just for the fun of it. It's the thought that counts.

Chandra said...

CONCERT!!!!!!!!!!!YAY!!!!!!!!!! AWESOME for you. I hope you sing words and all the girls throw you their bras and gotchies!

If you do a world tour in Canada.. I'm there!

Was the gift the teeth whitening?

Julie Schuler said...

I got so excited by cryptozoology, I forgot to do the human thing, and wish you a good performance. I'm sure you rocked it.

NYD said...

My Machine is a complete mess. It needs viagra, a colostomy, brain salad surgery and the opening chords from Stairway to Heaven to make it work right.

Have a blast at the concert and make sure someone takes pitures for you to post.

The Grunt said...

Julie~ Sounds like I need a subscription to that.

Chris~ Bruce would do well, I think.

O-Girl~ Well, I had no panties tossed my way. *Sigh*

Chandra~ It was all instrumental stuff that I did with two other guys. The gift was having a woman look after me.

Julie~ Overall, the performance went well. The first performance was a bit off, but everything else went well.

NYD~ Somebody was taking pictures and video, but they weren't somebody from my team, so to speak. I'll see what I can do.

Jules said...

So how do your teeth look?!!