Friday, March 31, 2006

Dedicated To Those Who Have Had Their Heart Ripped Out.

Okay, okay, I know this blog was cheery for a while, and it seems that I was blessed with more readers since. I promise that I just need to work some things out of my system. Go hold and pet a bunny, it is therapeutic. As for me, well, I feel I need to do a sympathetic purge for y'all, and purging aint pretty (thanks for the inspiration, Guggs). Call me a cross barer, but it's the least I could do for you. Maybe I'm going too far with the morbid stuff, or maybe I'm just getting started. I just can't help sabotage myself, put a spanner in the works, if you will. I'm just a li'l bastard, sometimes.

Let's pretend a little and see what happens.

(spins a bottle)

This post isn't about me, however. It is about you. It is a post that recognizes the pain that you went through. It may be a graphic picture, but it happened to you and this might not actually represent the total pain, loneliness, and betrayal that you went through at that time in your life. If I could put your heart back together again, I would. If I could thaw your winter, I would. If I could just get you to smile more...well, I might be able to do that, at least. I know I'm nothing more than a series of amusing pixels to you, perhaps. But, there are some who really know me and have witnessed my ability to soak up pain, be it physical or emotional. I'll clean up your mess if you'll let me, but you are too smart for that. My ego and my pride is already screwing things up in my own world, so why screw up yours?

It turns out, after all, I'm a terrible Jesus and an even worse Lucifer. The bottle stopped spinning, and it is pointing at me. I will step back and absorb what I can. Rip my heart out, so you can know what it feels like to be on the other end for a change. Maybe, this will hit that magic button in your mind and make it all better. But, if you can't get over the pain still, then please forgive me for thinking so highly of myself. I'm only human. Let's start over, fresh.

Some Lyrics of Patti Smith come to mind as well:

Pissing in a River

Pissing in a river, watching it rise
Tattoo fingers shy away from me
Voices voices mesmerize
Voices voices beckoning sea
Come come come come back come back
Come back come back come back

Spoke of a wheel, tip of a spoon
Mouth of a cave, I'm a slave I'm free.
When are you coming ? Hope you come soon
Fingers, fingers encircling thee
Come come come come come come
Come come come come come come for me oh

My bowels are empty, excreting your soul
What more can I give you ? Baby I don't know
What more can I give you to make this thing grow?
Don't turn your back now, I'm talking to you

Should I pursue a path so twisted ?
Should I crawl defeated and gifted ?
Should I go the length of a river
[The royal, the throne, the cry me a river]
Everything I've done, I've done for you
Oh I give my life for you.
Every move I made I move to you,
And I came like a magnet for you now.

What about it, you're gonna leave me,
What about it, you don't need me,
What about it, I can't live without you,
What about it, I never doubted you
What about it ? What about it ?
What about it ? What about it ?

Should I pursue a path so twisted ?
Should I crawl defeated and gifted ?
Should I go the length of a river,
[The royal, the throne, the cry me a river]
What about it, what about it, what about it ?
Oh, I'm pissing in a river.

T.G.~I thought that some of you might get off on a bit of this more emotional material. I hope it does something for you. I'll make with the funny in time...."DANCE MONKEY!!!" Yes, master.

P.S. For those paranormal freaks, check out the thin vortex streaming across the picture on the right.

(Edited since first posted).


Vera said...

to all the bastards who have ripped my heart out...

weapon of choice: meat cleaver

The Grunt said...

You got the early bird special, Vera. For those who are wondering what I'm talking about: The early bird special is when you get up earlier than I do and get to read a post that was hastily published, because I got too tired to edit stuff out, or revealed something that I wouldn't have normally.

In this case, I...well, I'm not telling. Neener-neener!

Vera said...

*notes the difference*

very interesting...

mona said...

not fair!!

nice post though, but hey live and learn no?

The Grunt said...

Don't read too much into any of this, just feel it if you can. That's the whole point of it all.

There will be more early bird specials ahead, Mona.

Anonymous said...

Wow that's truly heroic of you Der Grunt. Thanks for the sacrifice.

My weapon of choice would be the halberd.

The Grunt said...

Jiminy Christmas, Guggs, what do you plan to do to me with such a awesoome weapon?

Whoever they were must've really done a number on you.

Word Verificaiton Thingy: godkkf.

I knew it. He does exist! Just with more consonants, that is.

Vera said...

word verification: vnipp


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