Thursday, November 20, 2008

TIGF!!! White Crown Victoria Douche Bags

You know the types. The wanna be or retired authority figures. They could pick any other color or any other kind of big ass car, but no, they have to make like they are the feds, fuzz, or government official. These douches like to go around and yell at people, telling them what they can or can't do. There are the ones who take things a step further by putting spotlights on their Vic.

I've had a run in lately with one of these asshole "WCV" driving douches. I'm not going to go into details, but he yelled at me--frothing mad--about something that he thought I was doing at work wasn't legal. This mid-50s town sheriff wannabe about ran me over, he coming to a screeching stop on the wrong side of the road, then started showing off his likeness to a braying jackass by opening his mouth. He was so livid that he started taking off his seat belt and grabbing the door handle, like he was going to have to take out the trash, yep. After "setting me straight" I called my work's head of security, who is a real cop, and he confirmed that I was right and that douche was wrong. He also told me to call him immediately if this asshole harassed me again. It's always good to have a cop on your side.

Share with me your "White Crown Victoria" douche bag stories. They don't have to drive a WCV, per se, just fit the general profile.


Chris said...

In high school we had this kid who bought an old cop car which we found odd enough. He was odd so it was in keeping with what we thought about him. One day while we were having a particularly bad storm, the signal lights were out just in front of our school. A major intersection became a snarled mess. This kid (maybe 17 years old) pulls his car into the center of the intersection, pops his trunk and grabs some flares and begins directing traffic like a pro. The mayor gave him an accomodation.

Last time I heard, he was pulling a dime at San Quentin.

Scott said...

Those cars completely suck. I just come across all kinds of people in them who are plus 75. I get scared by them driving down our highways and byways. Not fun.

Queue_t said...

old guys in hats- drive those things.

you are so right on, never met one who didn't think he owned the road and everyone on it had to follow his rules.

I laughed out loud at the picture! you paint a vivid picture with your discription.

Julie Schuler said...

I love the word "braying".

Logophile said...

Ooooh yes, the wanna bes, arent they lovely?
I kinda wish you had stirred him up a little, get his blood pressure pumping, tee hee

NYD said...

If I buy one does that mean I get to act like a moron too?

The Grunt said...

Chris~ At least he used his car for good and not evil.

Scott~ If they ever did a remake of the movie Christene they should have the dude drive a Crown Vic.

QT~ Ain't that the truth!

Julie~ It's awesome.

Logo~ I did get his blood pumping and his forehead vein just about popped.

NYD~ Yes, it does.

Nicole said...

I drive a white crown vic.. I'm a professional young adult female. I'm in no way a douche bag. Gotta love stereotypes. I'm not a cop or anywhere near retired.. it just happens to be the car of my choice.