Wednesday, August 26, 2009

Adventures in Public Restroom Patronage #712

Have you ever entered a public restroom and wondered to yourself if this is what gorilla sex smells like?

I asked myself that question today. Only, I also wondered if this smell that I experienced was gorilla sex mixed with the aftermath of taco Tuesday at some hole-in-the-wall joint in the "ethnic" part of town. Whatever it was it was bad. The type of bad smell that curls up in-between your teeth and gums and takes a nap. Man, it was B.O. and human waste. Not only that but I think the person responsible made the room hotter and more humid somehow. I think scientists should follow this person around and collect samples of their droppings and other various products. There might be some value towards discovering an alternate fuel or energy source there.

I need to go brush my teeth now.

9 comments:

Julie Kwiatkowski Schuler said...

Your post reminded me of last week when I took my son into a port-a-potty at the county fair. We both crammed in, he used the facilities. I had wiped his hands maniacally with Wet Ones after the deed, but somehow he managed to touch the bottoms of his shoes (we had just visited the animals) and his face before we got to our picnic table. gak.

Christielli said...

Ewww. You should really post the location of this disgusting washroom as a public service announcement to those in your area.

I can't ever remember going into a washroom so disgusting. Of course, I'm the type to block that kind of thing out of my mind.

Jay Ferris said...

Been there. Especially when it's hot outside and the bathroom isn't air-conditioned. You end up covering your face not only to avoid the smell, but because you feel as if the air has substance to it and is going to get in your mouth.

rawbean said...

Wow.

Tys on Ice said...

My son is very finicky abt rest rooms...he went thru a major part of 1 week of our vacation in the mountains keeping it all in becoz he wasnt happy abt the state of the toilets...considering this is India we are talking abt, Iam worried for him...

but this post has successfuly restrained me from ordering out for lunch...my waist thanks thee

NYD said...

OK you just fucked up my breakfast.

Make that all my meals for the day

Joe Masse said...

I once visited the men's room at work after having had only a large bag of Doritos for lunch. One spark in there and the building would have been reduced to a cinder. Fortunately, the whole western world had outlawed smoking on the premises by then.

Jules said...

LMAO!! Oh man! That was hilarious, Grunty! No, I never have asked myself that question when entering a public washroom... but perhaps now that's ALL I'll ever think. And then I'll live out the rest of my life in dire need of finding out what gorilla sex actually DOES smell like so I know for sure...

Logophile said...

I just want you to know that you are now forever linked in my mind to gorilla sex.