Sometimes I feel like I'm left holding the bag of my mother and father's inadequate parenting. I have no idea what I am going to do about my older brother. He is a mess in so many ways that it is absolutely breaking my heart. I feel almost powerless to help him. I already watched one of my sisters kill herself with alcohol. My brother hasn't taken care of himself, is morbidly obese, can't even work a part-time job without physical and emotional issues. I've pretty much resigned myself to being his caretaker for the rest of his/my life. This will pretty much insure that I will have no progeny. It's hard to fix 'em when they're adults. Somewhere along the line my parents just stopped looking for answers for my brother. Oh, they wondered, but it never went as far as trying to get him help. I think my mother probably just kept putting his name in the temple prayer rolls, hoping that Jesus would come down in his magic spaceship and fix him for her. My dad did his best at never having meaningful interaction with him, only sporadic outbursts of aggressive demands and cut downs. It blows my mind.
F to the uck.
4 years ago